Fighting a chimp

I think the only way to solve this is to arrange a fight. I will start a chimp fighting journal. I will start with a small weak one and work my way up.

If anyone works in a zoo, PM me!

beef_pumper


They are only gonna cause damage if you let them get in close.  If you were skilled, you could win, a nicely timed kick to the jaw.  If this was a Gorilla you were talking about then no chance lol, they are absolute beasts.

You have the most exotic ideas of how fights with wild animals would go. I bet your one those people that says "id do this id so that" yet if you were ever put in the situation, ud **** urself and freeze. Who cares if a chimp is stronger than a bodybuilder or not, it cud just bite u and kill u.

bigjack

beef_pumper


They are only gonna cause damage if you let them get in close.  If you were skilled, you could win, a nicely timed kick to the jaw.  If this was a Gorilla you were talking about then no chance lol, they are absolute beasts.

You have the most exotic ideas of how fights with wild animals would go. I bet your one those people that says "id do this id so that" yet if you were ever put in the situation, ud **** urself and freeze. Who cares if a chimp is stronger than a bodybuilder or not, it cud just bite u and kill u.

I would clothline it, knocking it to the ground. Then i would get it in a figure 4 leg lock.

Irish Beast

bigjack

beef_pumper


They are only gonna cause damage if you let them get in close.  If you were skilled, you could win, a nicely timed kick to the jaw.  If this was a Gorilla you were talking about then no chance lol, they are absolute beasts.

You have the most exotic ideas of how fights with wild animals would go. I bet your one those people that says "id do this id so that" yet if you were ever put in the situation, ud **** urself and freeze. Who cares if a chimp is stronger than a bodybuilder or not, it cud just bite u and kill u.

I would clothline it, knocking it to the ground. Then i would get it in a figure 4 leg lock.

No DDT?

Cardifflad


Swift kick to the nads. Game over

you or him?

bigjack

beef_pumper


They are only gonna cause damage if you let them get in close.  If you were skilled, you could win, a nicely timed kick to the jaw.  If this was a Gorilla you were talking about then no chance lol, they are absolute beasts.

You have the most exotic ideas of how fights with wild animals would go. I bet your one those people that says "id do this id so that" yet if you were ever put in the situation, ud **** urself and freeze. Who cares if a chimp is stronger than a bodybuilder or not, it cud just bite u and kill u.

Where the fcuk did that come from, calm down LOL.
 
Have a look what I wrote, then look at what you wrote, prat.

jules.j

Irish Beast

bigjack

beef_pumper


They are only gonna cause damage if you let them get in close.  If you were skilled, you could win, a nicely timed kick to the jaw.  If this was a Gorilla you were talking about then no chance lol, they are absolute beasts.

You have the most exotic ideas of how fights with wild animals would go. I bet your one those people that says "id do this id so that" yet if you were ever put in the situation, ud **** urself and freeze. Who cares if a chimp is stronger than a bodybuilder or not, it cud just bite u and kill u.

I would clothline it, knocking it to the ground. Then i would get it in a figure 4 leg lock.

No DDT?

If I was going to DDT him I would set him up with a short arm clotheslines, not the conventional one!

Question marks still hang over their punch resistance. They could have chins made out of the finest china.

just do what you do when a human kicks off.

scissorkick him in the **** then multiple kneedops on his neck. no animal could withstand this. its tried and tested

Integra


Question marks still hang over their punch resistance. They could have chins made out of the finest china.

Should put them in against Amir Khan then to make things fair

beef_pumper

bigjack

beef_pumper


They are only gonna cause damage if you let them get in close.  If you were skilled, you could win, a nicely timed kick to the jaw.  If this was a Gorilla you were talking about then no chance lol, they are absolute beasts.

You have the most exotic ideas of how fights with wild animals would go. I bet your one those people that says "id do this id so that" yet if you were ever put in the situation, ud **** urself and freeze. Who cares if a chimp is stronger than a bodybuilder or not, it cud just bite u and kill u.

Where the fcuk did that come from, calm down LOL.
 
Have a look what I wrote, then look at what you wrote, prat.

prat? how grown up sayin something like that on here, u deserve a blue peter badge. I read what you said above, just in case you have problems reading as well as having a difference of opinion heres what you put "They are only gonna cause damage if you let them get in close.  If you were skilled, you could win, a nicely timed kick to the jaw."
 
This is what i was referring to, similar to the tiger thread where you were saying a grown man wouldnt have a problem, joka.

Beef Pumper and a dog vs BigJack and a chimp?

They are currently looking for promoters if anyone's interested....



As for claims of china chinned chimps, I think the structure of their skulls would give them granite jaws TBH! One problem with us fighting our imaginary animals is that we're used to the idea of our fists coming off better against a face, but that's only because humans have fragile faces!

Hypocrite, you're the one that needs to grow up saying that you bet i'm one of those people who's gives it all that on the internet, then when the sh.t goes down does sod all.  I didn't even say I would take on a chimp, so I don't know where that came from.  Read it!

beef_pumper


Hypocrite, you're the one that needs to grow up saying that you bet i'm one of those people who's gives it all that on the internet, then when the sh.t goes down does sod all.  I didn't even say I would take on a chimp, so I don't know where that came from.  Read it!

Ok beef_pumper.

Great thread, I loled all the way through.

I would'nt even try against a chimp unless I had a knife or some sharp object. The guy in the video got completely fecked by one; broken fingers, torn ear etc etc.

bigjack

beef_pumper


Hypocrite, you're the one that needs to grow up saying that you bet i'm one of those people who's gives it all that on the internet, then when the sh.t goes down does sod all.  I didn't even say I would take on a chimp, so I don't know where that came from.  Read it!

Ok beef_pumper.

Good.

beef_pumper

bigjack

beef_pumper


Hypocrite, you're the one that needs to grow up saying that you bet i'm one of those people who's gives it all that on the internet, then when the sh.t goes down does sod all.  I didn't even say I would take on a chimp, so I don't know where that came from.  Read it!

Ok beef_pumper.

Good.

no problem.

Wasp


Great thread, I loled all the way through.

I would'nt even try against a chimp unless I had a knife or some sharp object. The guy in the video got completely fecked by one; broken fingers, torn ear etc etc.

My sharp sense of humour could be useful. I would tell him a joke and when hes hysterical, then I would DDT him

In all seriousness i think the chimp being wild and having no sense of right or wrong or any morals lol  ( and have you seen the size of some of their nuts some serious Test there) would probably tear us all a new arsehole.

An unarmed man stands zero chance of beating a chimp.

A chimp could literally pull your arms off and beat you to death if it wished, to speculate any other outcome than death by chimp is pointless.