Fighting a chimp

Lmao ^^^^^

The Truly Wise Man NEVER Plays Leapfrog With A Unicorn.
         

you gotta watch out for this chimp!

TheMasterPlan

TheGunslinger


It amazes you we are talking about grip strength?

It amazes me people are talking about potentially being able to **** a chimp up when they cant bench their own bodyweight or do a decent number of chins.

All the preacher curls in the world are going to stop clint eastwoods mate from ripping your balls off.

Wheels has educated us, defeating a chimp would not require speed or strength, but superior cunning!
After wearing the chimp down with a few brutal games of chess, Wheels would pose a particularly confusing paradox for the chimp to ponder. While the chimp's tearing his hair out with frustration, Wheels offers a cup of tea, claiming it will help calm him down a bit. Chimp takes a few big gulps, before realising that cheeky Wheels has laced it with poison! Chimp sits back and smiles at Wheels while the poison starts to kick in, nodding a little in recognition of a superior foe. Seconds later, it's all over.
 

Close, but not quite on the money.  I would simply watch the said chimp from behind the safety of a cage while I suck on an ice lolly.  What the ape does behind the bars is up to him.  Ideally, he will go ape **** for my ammusement.

"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit"
Aristotle

drab4


Beef Pumper and a dog vs BigJack and a chimp?

They are currently looking for promoters if anyone's interested....



As for claims of china chinned chimps, I think the structure of their skulls would give them granite jaws TBH! One problem with us fighting our imaginary animals is that we're used to the idea of our fists coming off better against a face, but that's only because humans have fragile faces!

I'm pretty sure it's not really got much to do with the jaw, but the neck muscles, if they can't withstand the force of the blow your brain will bounce around inside your head and cause you to lose consciousness. They look like they'd be well adapted not to be knocked out easily though, with short necks etc!

War Lord

drab4


Beef Pumper and a dog vs BigJack and a chimp?

They are currently looking for promoters if anyone's interested....



As for claims of china chinned chimps, I think the structure of their skulls would give them granite jaws TBH! One problem with us fighting our imaginary animals is that we're used to the idea of our fists coming off better against a face, but that's only because humans have fragile faces!

I'm pretty sure it's not really got much to do with the jaw, but the neck muscles, if they can't withstand the force of the blow your brain will bounce around inside your head and cause you to lose consciousness. They look like they'd be well adapted not to be knocked out easily though, with short necks etc!

I would think the structure of the entire skull and neck will be a factor mate, you can't isolate it into just the neck, just the jaw, just the cranium, or whatever. The amount your brain moves depends on the whole structure of head and neck, not just one isolated component

With regards to how strong apes/chimps are I remember going to Busch gardens in florida - they have a large ape section and are considered world leaders in their conservation and the ultimate experts. There figures for the larger species were iirc Large male chimp approx. 4 times stronger than an average adult (not sure what an average adult is though) Orangutang 9 times stronger, and a large male silver back 20-25 times stronger. I would have doubted the silverback claim until I viewed exhibits of what young males did just whilst playing, they had numerous "toys" on display that had been destroyed in play, one example was a full size hickory axe handle which a young silverback had gotten hold of one hand on each end and then just snapped lol. The strength required for this feat alone is immense you could have savickas on one end and pudzianowski on the other and without anything to lever against they would never get close to doing this.

A chimp if it was not playing and for example was in a fullblown attack would imo destroy any human being, for those that say they would lump it on the chin lol, I think a chimp would prove to be much faster that most would expect, would not stand and trade lol, it would rush you and rip anyone to shreads, if you managed to land a punch you'd probably have a broken hand. These animals are tough beyond any human they routinely fall from trees very high up and survive.
 
Althought this is not directly applicable to the question, it demonstrates their power just read about a guy in the states who had them as pets, he kept them in enclosures where it was kept together by large nuts/bolts tightened with wrenches etc.. the chimps would unthread them, after a while he had the nuts welded on, he noticed that over time the chimps were unthreading these too lol.

If chimps were not wild animals and could play by the rules, (ie, could be reasoned with), you'd be on a level playing field.

If a chimp had an ability to follow rules, any decent boxer could take a chimp easlily in the ring. 

In reality they have physical attributes which we simply don't have, I've seen chimps jump at least 8 feet or so in zoo's. The big males I've seen, were mental, scarily psychotic.

I've no doubt someone like Terry Hollands could physically overpower a chimp, but with the teeth and the wildness, I'm pretty sure ol' Tel would be scared sh1tless, and the chimp would cause some major injuries. 

A chimp would use their god given attributes to try and kill a man, and we would use ours to kill a chimp, namely our intelligence. Forward planning and the ability to make and use tools, this means even the most primitive tribe could kill a whole group of chimps.

Humans lost the wild killer instinct thousands of years ago. It is not the strength of the animal that counts, its the speed and unrelentless frenzy of a wild animal attack that is the difference.
 
Humans live in a civilised world, where we are able to reason with even the most murderous human attacker. The chimp will not stop half way through thinking "what have I done"!

Indie I agree I think if you had a large male chimp who had the intention of fighting and the strongest human or best fighter the "wildness" and raw strength combination would win. I like it when people talk about choking etc.. lol well you've got to get them first and I have had locks/chokes demonstrated on me by one of the worlds top exponents of them, in a fight by rules indeed I would be in trouble but I (an old decrepid human) showed that if I could get my gnashers or nails anywhere near an arm or break a finger I could release a choke etc.. in 2-3 seconds.

Good luck to anyone who even thinks they would beat a chimp up lol.

A nice video lol.

Blue_Lagoon3000

Ive been entered a few times by delivery men, i didn't hold it against them.

easy way to settle this - we need an MT volunteer, one of the guys that thinks he'd win such a fight (tee hee).

Then we can all have a whip-round and buy him a ticket to London zoo. I'll be happy to video the subsequent massacre fight on my camera phone and post it.