Funny things your dad did ?

I just reminded myself of this in another thread.
 
When driving with him in the car, he told me the ciggy lighter was a turbo button (I was 5). It looks a bit like an exhaust with smoke, hes explanation LOL
 
He'd tell me to press it, then obviously toe the gas, which I thought was the turbo working. Makes me chuckle now !
 
What about you and your dad ?

Whenever I asked my Dad who was on the phone, he would reply 'It's a man about a dog'.

I couldn't work out why some guy used to phone the house so often to talk about a dog.

HAHA - Taking things too literal. I was the same when he said 'I've got a bone to pick with you'.

In my head I was thinking about digging up the garden :)

yungdest81


HAHA - Taking things too literal. I was the same when he said 'I've got a bone to pick with you'.

In my head I was thinking about digging up the garden :)

I'm ashamed to say that that one used to get me as well.

when ever my dad was going anywhere (be it the pub, shop, neighbours) and i would ask where he was off too, if he didnt want me to come he would say "im going to buy some nails"

my dad swore his fave football team was bare arse. i was only a nipper and had never heard of arsenal....

Another one...

On a extremely foggy morning he told me to watch from the window as he walked to the shop. He said he will make himself disapeer.

I didn't really fall for that one after I saw he slowly disapeer into the mist. Dissapointed to say the least.

john_cappa


when ever my dad was going anywhere (be it the pub, shop, neighbours) and i would ask where he was off too, if he didnt want me to come he would say "im going to buy some nails"

Alot of pictures in your house ? :)

Nothing....my dad was/is a ****.

He used to tell me if i strip naked as fast as i can and touch his bum before he could, i'd get extra sweets. We used to play this game right up until I was 11 and then all of a sudden I never saw him again

My Dad used to tell me we were distantly related to Romanian royalty. And he used to blush when reading the Emperor's New Clothes when it came to the page with the picture of the emperor's bum.

He used to love asking me to pull his finger................

Can't think of anything off the top of my head which is quite sad

My dad told me that the condom machine on the sh1t house wall in the boozer sold naughty balloons.... They had pictures on them of naked ladies apparently.

For many years i asked for some naughty balloons... Even when other people were near us as i didnt have a clue what thet were so didnt see a problem in it.. haha

My dad always used to pretend the car was running out of petrol and making it run all juddery by bouncing his foot on the accelerator. I now do the same!

monitor


Whenever I asked my Dad who was on the phone, he would reply 'It's a man about a dog'.

I couldn't work out why some guy used to phone the house so often to talk about a dog.

Whenever I asked my grandad 'why?', he always said "because Y isn't Z and Z isn't Y".

My dad told me that between him and his twin brother, they knew everything there was to know.
If I asked him something he didn't know, he'd say "Our David knows that one!".

By grand father used to work in a grocers that had an old stable yard at he back. Lying around was an old, much battered 56 lb weight minus it's handle.

"What's that for Grandad?" I asked
"Catching rabbits lad" he replied
"How do you catch rabbits with that?" I asked
"Place it in the centre of the room" he explained, "cover it with lettuce leaves, and some pepper, then the rabbits will come to eat the lettuce and get pepper up their noses, they sneeze and knock themselves out. In the morning, I just pick them up"
"I've never seen any rabbits in here" I observed
"Caught 'em all lad" said he with a grin

He used to salute magpies as well

My father has / had the magic ability to give me a dead arm or leg with the first punch everytime.

I think he must have studied Chinese medicine....

Sometimes he would punch me a bit too hard and I would cry.  Even though this was play fighting, I'm guessing it would be perceived differently in this day and age.