Tobyh5 - First show done. Invite to British Finals. Pictures on page 12

Good.....I'm glad you have others to be with you when you need a hug....

Hi Toby... sorry to hear your news.

Wishing you and your son all the best.

Flanders

Hey man, hope your son is on the mend?

Falls into insignificance now, but was gonna make a suggestion re your choc cravings.... Can you not sacrafice a few cals throughout the day, and then have Quark/Cottage Cheese mixed in with Chocolate Options?

Take Care mate, and all wishing for a speedy recovery for the little one 

Well I am back after a challenging two weeks, been tough and tough times ahead but back to the grindstone of gym and diet.

Took a couple pics on Friday to show how I have softened on the edges but it is good motivation to want the next pics to be the best ever. Been an unfortunate time but some things are more important than the gym and what has been happening in my life the last two weeks certainly teaches that weighing a piece of chicken is not so important. 

I would say that these two images are the worse I am prepared to look though.

Hey there mister, been thinking about you and your family but didn't want to butt in and keep posting....good to see you back TobyH, and if those two pics are the worst you will be looking I just think this;

"waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy to goooooooooooooooo"

ok?.....take care big fella.....and welcome back....

Thanks NG...Lad is recovering slowly, had him to stay on Weds, Friday and Saturday nights which is our normal routine and been up his mums every other day to check in on him. Tough seeing my boisterous little man so poorly still and wobbly on his feet and with a left arm he cannot use which is hangover of what happened. 

We seen physio and so will help him get back to top form but been a draining time what with that and the other situation.

But I am sitting smiling after having my ladies (14 and 12 years old - how did I get old enough to have teenage daughters!) and my little man who is the worlds most loving boy to stay, back in the normal routine of three nights per week after two crappy weeks - had my son in my bed to keep close eye on him and this morning he woke me up and said, "love you daddy" which is says about ten times a day and it is sooo cute.

I am blessed really :-)

Yes you are TobyH5.........and I'm glad for you. Warmest of hugs to your little lad and if good thoughts do travel through the airways, he has them in bundles...

What can i say,this is a great journal,i have just read it all the way through.So glad your boy is getting better,my kids are my life.You look great mate and i hope one day that i could look like you....Only one question,hows the no smoking going,i was also on champix.

Hey Stevie, thanks for stopping by.

The Champix has worked amazing for me. I have had zero cravings and I was a 40 per day man for 20 years (well built up to 40) and a serious smoker. I never thought I would be able to give up but it has been very easy with the Champix. I have been weaning myself off them and only taking half the recommended amount as I do not want to be reliant on them but I think it has broken the back of my habit.

I know they dont work for everyone but I think the difference is that I have thought I should give up previously but this time actually wanted to. 

Thanks for kind comments too. 

Hey man, I just read through your journal too, fantastic. Can see you going through some tough times, i'm the proud dad of a ten week old little girl and i can only imagine how hard it has been for you and your lad. I hope it's all starting to improve for him now and wish you all the luck for next year, I'm hoping to enter my first comp next year, also in the BNBF like yourself. Good luck with everything mate and stay strong.

Thanks Ox, which region will you be in and which category? And thank you for the nice comment mate.

Back on it today

Legs day - touch one to be out of the blocks with!!

Warm ups - Barbell Squat - 12 x 50%, 10 x 50%, 6 x 65%, 4 x 80%, 3 x 90%

Working Sets
Barbell Squat
6 x 120kg
6 x 120kg
4 x 120kg
Tough tough, first set was solid, second was ok, last was poor with not enough depth, probably should have taken 10kg off 

Machine Leg Press
6 x 180kg
6 x 180kg
6 x 180kg
First two sets were very solid and felt good, last set I did not go all the way down, prob could of but was in the mood to make it easier on myself. Naughty and will have to be good boy rest of the week

Machine Leg Curl
6 x 70kg
6 x 75kg
5 x 75kg
Good curling although 75kg may be a smidge too much, shoulda stayed at 70 at I was not curling all the way under for complete hammy contractions.

SLDL
6 x 130kg
6 x 130kg
5 x 130kg
Getting strong on these, will record a set next week for some form critique though. I do not lower bar to floor but to about two inches off, last set I put it down on rep 5 and could not get it back up, once it was gone it was gone, damn! Happy though as approaching double bodyweight on this

Smith Machine Calf Raise
8 x 140kg
8 x 140kg
I should make this heavier as I do all the reps but it really makes my back scrunch down with double body weight sitting on shoulders. Maybe up weight a little but also on this one have to up reps as it is a lot of load on the back for a 70kg man!

Machine Calf Raises
8 x 140kg
8 x 140kg
8 x 140kg
May push up to 150kg next week, calf muscles were burning at end. 

Summary - not too bad, not awesome, not great but solid enough with some form checking needed on squats. Happy enough

I'm aiming for the central region as a novice. Big time novice! I was a competing strongman until accident, prep for strongman contest a tad different from bodybuilding! Relishing the chance though and really helps training having something to aim for. Thinking I should start a journal up too, not sure i have time to keep it updated though!

Nice leg w/out btw, no way i can lift at that time of the morning, it's all I can do to haul my backside out of bed for fasted cardio! Mind you having a ten week old means i'm usually awake at 5!!

Cheers mate, I am notoriously bad in the mornings, always have been but god knows how, I do manage to do it.

After years of trying and failing early mornings I now get up there at 6.30am every day without fail and get out of bed at 5.45am so that I can get breakfast and adequate pre-workout nutrition!

Hell yeah, strongman and bodybuilding are miles different in many aspects but for me also some similarities in that I believe in lift heavy no matter what to make the muscles grow and the build shape is down to diet, cardio and rest :-)

Yeah I agree mate, to be honest my gym training isn't that much different from when I competed in strongman, upping my cardio hasn't been too hard but must admit diet has been tough. Getting there though down from 21 stone to 15stone 10lbs with a strength increase! so well pleased really. Best of luck with it all mate and i'll check in from time to time when I can.

Morning Tobyh5...have a good day mister...

A video taken this morning. Self doubt is my overwhelming feeling at the moment. Waist too thick, upper torso, chest, shoulders lacking depth and mass. Makes me look straight and one size all over rather than tapered and bulked. Think I look muscular compared to Mr Average but definetly not potential body builder, not even Lightweight which I am aiming for which is less bulked anyway. I am carrying a bit more softness due to the two weeks from hell I have had, light is too bright and camera is not superb but reality is, I am nowhere near looking like I can potentially get on the stage next year.
 
Very confused at the moment, want to add mass and depth and size on upper area but not willing to add just weight, fat and stuff all over which when i would come to cutting would only leave me back where i am right now. How the hell do I add upper shape which is good muscle????
 
Please chip in and critique, maybe I am being too harsh on myself, 8 months til i would be getting on stage, perhaps a four month lean as I can bulk and then three month cut and one month comp harsh prep would do it. ****e, i dunno!!!??
Thanks guys for any advice or help :-)
 

your being far far too hard on yourself there mate, far too hard.

as i have said before, that condition on a bnbf stage, while maybe not show winning, would be far from the worst condition. from where you are now 4-6 weeks playing around with diet and cardio a bit and you could come in absoloutely shreadded.

i cant see your legs so can only comment on upper body.  shoulders, arms and abs are really good.  a little more focus on traps, upper chest, and outer lats/upper back if you want to really balance everything out perfectly. 

other than that, just adding a few quality lbs more mass to everything, but you would be fine as you are right now, i promise you!

your focus right now should be on adding quality muscle, so as a rough guide id say look for 2lbs a month increase.  there will be a little fat in that, but you wont have a problem getting that off, and it wont be a huge amount.  i would say it would be better to just go on how your looking, but like me you have a problem looking objectively at yourself.  it could also be worth measuering all bodyparts, then you can keep a track of where any weight gain is going.

posing, ive said before that it needs work, so no need to cover that really, but there is potential there to make yourself look better just by getting that right.  as an example, when doing a biceps pose either front or back, keep your elbows closer to 90degrees, your flexing them too much at the moment, and it closes everything in and makes you look smaller. 

Mate, your being far too critical of youself, looking bloody good. Self doubt always creeps in, don't let it!

Thanks guys

This journal is incredibly hard mentally with so many highs and lows, self doubt followed by over confidence. It is a crest of emotions as well as hard dieting and training.

I appreciate the feedback Daz and I am trying to be objective plus understand myself and feel that perhaps my best route would be as you said aim to add a little mass of a couple pounds a month which should not harm my leanness too much and then blitz off any surplus for show condition in the last 6 weeks. 

I am thinking and possibly your feedback strengthened that, that I may not be the most massed on the stage so I need to accept that and try to come from a different angle and that will have to be shredded to fcuk. If I cannot be the biggest then perhaps I can be the best conditioned and most shredded so will work more towards that while trying to gain some small extra mass.

Also right that no damn leg video here so I have taken one this morning so a more overall picture of where I am can be seen. Appreciate any further feedback on the legs Daz, or anyone else generally on upper and lower;
 * My gym has such bright lights it makes it hard to see things on the videos as well as I would like but I think you can make it all out just about ok.

Thanks

Blimey!!!! that brightned up my morning no end!.. .....morning Tobyh5!!!...lolol....I can't add anything on the BB side cos I know nowt! but your pins don't look to bad to me....

I don't know why you are so down on yourself mister...you have a cracking figure...a really good base to work from on all the stuff Dazc said....did you see his pics and what he has had to go through and how he looked before and after?....if anyone knows about self doubt and can really help you with stuff he can.....dont' be down on yourself....look how far you have come..you look brilliant......

and...please don't think I was being rude or forward or anything..i didn't mean it in any way like that...just me 'aving a muck like I do.....have a good day Tobyh5 and hugs to you and the gang.....