Bookmark this thread:     |
Login  | |
|
RE: embarassing siuations - Apr. 16 2008 16:57:44
| |
|
eddie182
Posts: 1008
Joined: Dec. 20 2006
Status: offline
|
sacked from what? he was a student and just got suspended for 1 week.
_____________________________
Updates on current girl situation coming soon ;)
| |
|
|
RE: embarassing siuations - Apr. 16 2008 17:09:55
| |
|
Dan Nukem
Posts: 9299
Joined: Sep. 21 2002
From: Ireland
Status: offline
|
FPMSL, quality thread 
| |
|
|
RE: embarassing siuations - Apr. 16 2008 18:12:38
| |
|
Papa Lazarou
Posts: 8954
Joined: Feb. 16 2006
Status: offline
|
Remind me the Big D one. Did the deed a few times when I was younger and my mum asked what was on the back of my quilt. Claimed i'd dropped a yogurt on my qulit cover. Don't think she believed me tho...
...also got caught with the Pirelli calander book in my room a few times too. Ripped the piss out of me for years the folks did...
_____________________________
"Everybody pities the weak; jealousy you have to earn." - Arnold Schwarzenegger
Bench 150k x 6 x 4
Squat 180k 8x4
Deadlift 242.5k
BW 16 stone 2lbs
My Journal
| |
|
|
RE: embarassing siuations - Apr. 16 2008 18:29:07
| |
|
Son of Frank
Posts: 410
Joined: Jun. 16 2007
From: North Wales
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: Big D
when i was about 14 got home from school went upstairs for my post school nap, got a bit carried away and had nothing to hand to clean myself up with.
anyway passed out with my 'juice' all over my stomach, trousers round my ankles and top pulled up with my n0b still in my hand.
little did i know but my sister had come in, seen the state i was in (she was about 10 at the time) and went to fetch my mum as she thought something was wrong with me. my mum came back in with my sister saw me and quickly ushered my sister out telling her i was fine and just sleeping.
i didnt find all this out until i was about 18/19 and my mum and sister decided to rip the piss out of me!
not my most dignifying experience 
I have heard a wide variety of phrases for "milking the lizard" but I have to say that is a new one!!!
FPMSL BTW
| |
|
RE: embarassing siuations - Apr. 16 2008 22:21:22
| |
|
leerc
Posts: 1052
Joined: Sep. 27 2007
From: united kingdom
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: eddie182
sacked from what? he was a student and just got suspended for 1 week.
obviously for catching someone doing something wrong eh should be punished
_____________________________
quote:
ORIGINAL: Dan Nukem
You little tease, your just begging for me to piss in your ear aren't you, little minx!
myprotien.co.uk get 5% off using this code MP49353
| |
|
|
RE: embarassing siuations - Apr. 16 2008 22:44:51
| |
|
Son of Frank
Posts: 410
Joined: Jun. 16 2007
From: North Wales
Status: offline
|
When I was 17 (many years ago) I started work at a large government building in Manchester. I was placed on the ground floor amongst about 40 staff. A lot of the staff were much older than me and initially I felt a bit out of place and uncomfortable TBH. Anyway after getting my first weeks wages I went out on the beer to celebrate. Went to work next day with a hangover and REALLY bad wind. I must have gone to the gents 4 or 5 times in the first hour and was asked by my boss why I kept leaving the office (it was really strict in those days). Embarrassed I apologised and said it would not happen again. I then sat there for 30 minutes with a tornado of wind building up inside me. I couldn't take it any more but knew I daren't leave the office again so I announced I was off to the storeroom (within office in corner but separate room) for some file covers. I scuttled into the storeroom and ran to the far corner furthest away from the door and let out a series of about 10 farts. Sadly, with the last one I followed through and was stuck in the storeroom still wearing my soiled undies. I was terrified someone might walk in but to get out of the office I knew I had to walk the full length of the room past all the staff. I therefore had to remove them and hide them in a file cover. I got to the storeroom door and panicked about the smell so I literally sprinted the full length of the office and straight to the gents where I flushed the offending pants away (thank god they flushed!). I composed myself and returned to the office beetroot red explaining about my upset stomach. I was terrified the rest of the day with no undies on and couldn't wait for the day to end.
| |
|
|
RE: embarassing siuations - Apr. 17 2008 9:42:03
| |
|
James
Posts: 24966
Joined: Nov. 10 2000
From: healthyaction.co.uk
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: Son of Frank
When I was 17 (many years ago) I started work at a large government building in Manchester. I was placed on the ground floor amongst about 40 staff. A lot of the staff were much older than me and initially I felt a bit out of place and uncomfortable TBH. Anyway after getting my first weeks wages I went out on the beer to celebrate. Went to work next day with a hangover and REALLY bad wind. I must have gone to the gents 4 or 5 times in the first hour and was asked by my boss why I kept leaving the office (it was really strict in those days). Embarrassed I apologised and said it would not happen again. I then sat there for 30 minutes with a tornado of wind building up inside me. I couldn't take it any more but knew I daren't leave the office again so I announced I was off to the storeroom (within office in corner but separate room) for some file covers. I scuttled into the storeroom and ran to the far corner furthest away from the door and let out a series of about 10 farts. Sadly, with the last one I followed through and was stuck in the storeroom still wearing my soiled undies. I was terrified someone might walk in but to get out of the office I knew I had to walk the full length of the room past all the staff. I therefore had to remove them and hide them in a file cover. I got to the storeroom door and panicked about the smell so I literally sprinted the full length of the office and straight to the gents where I flushed the offending pants away (thank god they flushed!). I composed myself and returned to the office beetroot red explaining about my upset stomach. I was terrified the rest of the day with no undies on and couldn't wait for the day to end.
That's funny
You can't beat poo stories!
| |
|
|
RE: embarassing siuations - Apr. 17 2008 10:20:52
| |
|
MrMauy
Posts: 496
Joined: Aug. 23 2007
Status: offline
|
I was working in Malta with my boss and so on a night out over there he disappeared off to the toilet, half an hour (and 2 drinks) later he returns red faced and wanting to go to a different pub.....
Here's the email he sent to one of our colleagues!
A horrific true fart story to enlighten your birthday – from 4 nights ago here in Malta....
1. Mr X has a pee in pub toilet with 2 inches of pee on the floor – he is wearing jeans, flip-flops and fortunately brand new (only worn that night) black shorts.
2. He has already drank 10 (no exaggeration) vodka red bulls and half a bottle of Barolo.
3. He pee’s in the cubicle
4. He washes his hands and then ‘spidermans’ back away from the sink to avoid filling his flip-flops and jeans with a multinational urine/vomit floor ****tail.
5. He doesn’t think anything of it but a fart beckoned which was alarmingly more fulfilling than originally thought. A small butt squeeze was followed by the same agonising adrenaline filled pain-fear that Nick Leeson felt when he relaised that he’d lost $100 Million dollars in a single day. Yep, a dessert spoon of warm Scotch butt broth had released onto my hairy canopy.
6. Thanking the lord that he was alone in the bog whilst actually saying out loud “No, No No, No No No, No No...” he shimmys to the cubicle whilst “spidermanning” around the pee/puke ****tail. I’m sure you can figure out what sort of effect shimmying around like an emporer penguin has on a small amount of wet, warm cack in between your tightened butt-cheeks.
7. He reaches the cubicle – (out loud) “No, No No, No No No, No No...” = no toilet roll. (Again out loud) “No, No No, No No No, No No...” = no lock on the door!
8. After contorting himself left, right up and down whilst leaning against the door he manages to get his jeans off – this time it’s too difficult to avoid the pee and his flip-flops take a load like New Orleans.
9. The jeans (with a small amount of pee round the bottom where the flip-flop splashing took place are now around his neck - Again out loud) “No, No No, No No No, No No...”. He’s still leaning, sweating almost crying against the unlocked door at this stage with a squished poo-medallion stamped on both the canopy and the shorts!
10. Whipping down the dirty kecks he remembers that there is no toilet roll (Again out loud) “No, No No, No No No, No No...” The kecks are folded twice and then used to wipe the filth from his butt three times. He then hides the kecks as best he can by pushing them behind the cistern of filth – trying not to vomit at the smell of the urine around the back of the toilet, remember it was about 35 – 40C inside the dirty bog. Please remember his jeans are still around the back of his neck and he’s now naked from the waist down except a pair of urine filled flip-flops! AND he’s trying to stop the drunkards from entering the cubicle!
11. The great quick escape - The jeans get put back on like lightening in one manoeuvre and he flee’s to be free again! Out of there like the flash!
That’s Nissssccche.
I can vouch that the above is true as it took me a good ten minutes to stop laughing long enough to walk!
| |
|
|
Printable Version
New Messages
No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages
Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages
Locked w/o New Messages
Post New Thread