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Being Overprotective?

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Blasphemousfish
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2006/07/18 15:10:35 (permalink)
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Being Overprotective?

Ok, let me set the scene; My little sister is 15 years old. Her shoulders are almost as broad as mine, she weighs in at almost 11 stones, she's a national standard Tomeiki Aikidoker (3rd in the country at her age group in 2003), she used to play club level rugby union (as a prop... on the boys team ), I seen her plant a perfect right straight on the nose of a bully at her school (blood everywhere - very impressive) and she once dislocated the arm of a girl who pulled her hair (not one for fighting like a girl, my sis!).

So I've never really had to worry about her before... now I am. She brought a boy home the other day.

I know exactly what I was like at 15/16... and I don't like the idea of her getting up to what I got up to!

Is expecting her to remain chaste and innocent for her entire life (or at least mine) really that unreasonable? If so then I'm gonna need some advice on how to intimidate the crap out of anyone else she might bring home without being obvious about it... (failing that, some advice on how to deal with this over protective streak I seem to have).

We do not forgive. We do not forget. 
#1

35 Replies Related Threads

    Total Rebuild
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/18 15:17:07 (permalink)
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    Its going to be hard for you mate, but unless the guy she brings home is either a;

    Druggy
    Drop Out
    Unemployable
    Chav
    Drunk
    Violent Person

    You are going to have to take a back seat and let your sister develop from a child into a woman. If any of the above apply then feel free to tw*t him.
    #2
    Antonyd
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/18 15:20:45 (permalink)
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    I can relate mate!

    I've got a little sister who is 10 yrs younger than me. I'm 31 and she's 21. Like your little sis she's always been able to look after herself so I've never had any cause for concern despite the few occasions I've had to go sort things out (cuz thats what Big Bro's are for).

    No matter what you do she's gonna grow up and you have to get used to the fact that she's going to be going out with lads. The best advice I can give is to let her make her own mistakes but you should let her know that no matter what she does, you'll always be there for her if she should ever need you.
    Just be polite to anyone she brings home, chances are he'll be sh*tting himself at the prospect of meeting you anyway and be honest, if you think he's a decent lad tell her.

    If you can enjoy yourself, why can’t you enjoy anyone else?
    #3
    DEAD_WEIGHT
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/18 15:23:39 (permalink)
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    From what you say she can look out for her self, fighting i mean, but aswell i think she sounds alot smarter for her age.

    I would say sit back let get on with her life, if you start to but in with what she is doing you could be the one with a broken nose LOL

    But really just stay calm sit her down and talk to her and just make sure she is careful in what ever she is doing. It will be a bit embarrasing but it will make you feel alot better and she will also understand that you are there for her too.

    Good luck with everything
    #4
    Miss H
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/18 15:27:57 (permalink)
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    To be honest, your sis sounds like she can handle her buisness.

    Just stay close to her, so when some prune makes her cry she'll come to you.

    My big brother never stuck his nose in my life but i always knew he was there and i was close enough to tell him EVERYTHING!!!

    You Can't Polish A Turd!
    #5
    Faux Real
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/18 15:58:33 (permalink)
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    ORIGINAL: Miss H

    To be honest, your sis sounds like she can handle her buisness.

    Just stay close to her, so when some prune makes her cry she'll come to you.

    My big brother never stuck his nose in my life but i always knew he was there and i was close enough to tell him EVERYTHING!!!


    Yeah, good advice....or just intimidate her friends so she never talks to you again but you get to know (think) she didnt get up to anything.
    #6
    shK
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/18 16:04:36 (permalink)
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    Just relax man. Shes growing up, and you know girls when you were her age were putting out e.t.c and it wasn't a big deal. Suck it up, let her know your there if **** hits the fan (weirdo/stalker) and let her get on with it. Being overprotective will annoy her, and make you look silly.

    It's gonna happen some day, don't suffocate her.
    #7
    Big_Ad
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/18 17:12:06 (permalink)
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    Mate I have two younger sisters, one is 18 and one is 15.

    I can relate.

    You will have to get used to it I'm afraid, it's her life and she needs to experience normal things.

    Get to know the boy - both my sisters boyfriends I like, more so my little sisters who is 16 even though he is a typical boy and likes a drink, I like him he respects her/"loves" her - whatever.

    You have to let her live and learn. She can obviously take care of herself mate so I wouldn't worry.
    #8
    Blasphemousfish
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 14:31:18 (permalink)
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    Taa for the advice. It's what I needed to hear.

    We do not forgive. We do not forget. 
    #9
    predator1984uk
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 14:43:27 (permalink)
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    bully him all the way m8 lol
    #10
    sl
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 14:50:48 (permalink)
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    ORIGINAL: predator1984uk

    bully him all the way m8 lol

    agreed
    #11
    Big_Ad
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 14:50:53 (permalink)
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    ORIGINAL: predator1984uk

    bully him all the way m8 lol


    ROFL.

    Dare say I did hint a few threats, one being:

    "You know I'll chop your dick off if you get her pregnant, rite?"

    his reply:

    "I'll chop my own dick off if I get her pregnant"

    Only problem there is, it means they've been having sex, LOL ffs. All I can say is, what they get up to is completely normal, as long as she is careful mate, everyone lives from their mistakes and you can't expect your sister to be any different. I don't regret NOTHING, some things which were quite bad I never regret them because I've learned from them.
    #12
    john e big gunns
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 14:59:38 (permalink)
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    Do what I do with my 21yr old daughters boyfriends

    I pull him to one side and give him some friendly advice of what he'll have to put up with

    And also say to her 'that he seems a nice lad' at that she soon gets shut of'um

    Works every time
    #13
    YumPies
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 15:24:06 (permalink)
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    Shes gonna smoke, try drugs, have sex everywhere in every position known to man.

    Suck it up and get on with your life, just be there when her heart gets broken(going to happen sometime) or if some psycho wants her.

    My sisters 19 and i recently met her bf, hes a cock
    #14
    Sideeffectwhu
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 15:37:51 (permalink)
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    My daughter is only 3 and I am already looking to take martial arts up to be ready when she brings boys home. I am going to be well overprotected to her. I owe her that.

    Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real
    #15
    YumPies
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 15:40:46 (permalink)
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    ORIGINAL: Sideeffectwhu

    My daughter is only 3 and I am already looking to take martial arts up to be ready when she brings boys home. I am going to be well overprotected to her. I owe her that.


    Lmfao, if your not joking your daughters going to detest you.

    only thing your protecting her from by being overprotective is Independence, Confidence, Respect from her friends.
    #16
    Yib
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 15:45:45 (permalink)
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    Yep, or she'll just learn to do things behind your back.. that's all. That's not what you want is it?

    #17
    Sideeffectwhu
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 15:49:58 (permalink)
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    Ill tag her so I know where she is. Cant win really. Just have to try and bring her up with respect and . Im sure you all will help. Cant believe how quick she is growing up.

    Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real
    #18
    Ankzz
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 15:59:32 (permalink)
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    Well being the baby girl in the family i relate to your sister to be honest.

    If you hassle her over it shes just gonna stop teling you about anything and that isnt good. Just be there for her.

    Oh yeah, and follow what my dad did: he took me to self-defence classes as soon as I start dating (though it does seem she can take care of herself!9

    On hinsight I will say my brother once threatened to beat up an ex-bf of mine if he didnt leave me alone. Didnt find out about this til two months after it happened, but ex-bf did leave me alone and appreciated my bro looking out for me!

    wuld have loved to see ex´s face..
    #19
    Yib
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    RE: Being Overprotective? 2006/07/19 16:05:58 (permalink)
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    Hmm.. tagging her doesn't sound like a good idea if you're serious about that.

    Really.. the more you push the harder she'll push back. And it'll all eventually blow up in your face.

    The child has to make the right decisions on they're own. If you've not taught them properly to begin with and then don't let them ever learn or judge what's right for them on their own, then you've basically handicapped them tbh. We don't all live in some fantasy world.. there's a difference between reality and what is maybe ideal. What you can do is help expose them to different realities so that they know how to deal with them once they come face to face with the situation.

    There's a reason why so many daughters don't speak to their fathers. And there is also another reason why so many of us have to do so much behind either parent's back. It's like you don't give us the choice really.


    #20
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