YB
BannerBanner

Hot!Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age?

Author
ANIMAL
Pro-Member
  • Total Posts : 12007
  • Reward points: 7978
  • Joined: 2009/09/06 10:51:59
  • Location: South
  • Status: online
2018/08/09 21:47:26 (permalink)
0

Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age?

Both my grandmothers were secondary school maths teachers.

But as they both got into their 80’s, one of them got dementia and by the end , she didn’t know who she was or where she was or anything. It was heartbreaking this person who was once sharp as a knife basically a conscious vegetable.

My other gran on the other hand stayed 100% mentally sharp. But her whole body had deteriorated and basically stopped working. My dad carried her into the hospital like a child before she died as her arms and legs just didn’t work anymore and she couldn’t control anything. But she was having full on conversations with everyone, about what was about to happen, she even asked for a book holder so she could read and someone turned the pages for her.

These two people who had such a fundamental impact on me going in the complete opposite direction. I’ve been struggling with what I would prefer to happen to me as i age.

Not having a clue who I am and not being able to recognise my family is horrid but also the mental burden it puts on them.

But then not having the control of your own body, not being able to feed, dress, wash, wipe etc and knowing you are reliant on others and are fully aware of what’s happening sounds even worse.

Tbh I would like to go sooner before anything gets to that stage

But if you had to choose?
#1

13 Replies Related Threads

    Kaneda
    Pro-Member
    • Total Posts : 6761
    • Reward points: 9725
    • Joined: 2006/08/17 13:42:42
    • Location: Southern Fairy
    • Status: offline
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/09 21:58:14 (permalink)
    0
    As long as my mind is sound I have control of when I go, if I choose.

    Wouldn’t wish dementia on anyone, absolutely destroys families.
    #2
    ANIMAL
    Pro-Member
    • Total Posts : 12007
    • Reward points: 7978
    • Joined: 2009/09/06 10:51:59
    • Location: South
    • Status: online
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/09 22:05:11 (permalink)
    0
    Kaneda
    As long as my mind is sound I have control of when I go, if I choose.

    Wouldn’t wish dementia on anyone, absolutely destroys families.


    You don’t have control tho, you would need assistance from someone you trust to go as your body doesn’t function and that puts them at risk. But that’s another thread.

    I agree about dementia. just a terrible heartbreaking thing
    #3
    Kaneda
    Pro-Member
    • Total Posts : 6761
    • Reward points: 9725
    • Joined: 2006/08/17 13:42:42
    • Location: Southern Fairy
    • Status: offline
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/09 22:09:37 (permalink)
    0
    Depends how far you let yourself go o guess.
    #4
    Floydy.
    Olympian Member
    • Total Posts : 973
    • Reward points: 929
    • Joined: 2017/05/28 00:14:52
    • Status: offline
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/10 03:05:10 (permalink)
    0
    Firstly Animal, I'm sorry to hear about your gran's. It's a horrendous thing seeing anyone pass away before your eyes.
     
    I have lost both my parents to dementia within the past seven years and along with cancer and MS, it's the most awful, restrictive disease. My dad was in a great deal of pain as his body began to lose control of basic walking, then the ability to use his hands. He would lose interest in everything. We had no idea about this being dementia, we just thought he was becoming stubborn and not interested as he approached his mid-eighties. Then his mind began to wander, he became immobile and eventually had to be put into a care home. He died in 2011 after refusing food and drink in a great deal of pain.
     
    My mother was the most active person. She would walk and cycle miles, was extremely artistic and creative and was full of life into her early 80's. Suddenly, almost overnight she would start to behave strangely. She would go out and end up miles from home and be brought back by the police. She was also very aggressive and would refuse any kind of help or even visits from us and barricade herself in her bedroom. She developed fronto-lobal dementia and passed away peacefully last year.
     
    That wasn't easy to write. Having seen this happen, i.e. mind and body go at the same time I wouldn't be able to "choose" one or the other way to go. It's a harrowing thing to witness. Perhaps I'd rather keep my mind, but I'd much rather die suddenly and be put out of any misery to myself or that my family would have to endure.  
    #5
    Brett
    Pro-Member
    • Total Posts : 6972
    • Reward points: 11564
    • Joined: 2004/04/03 10:20:37
    • Location: Australia
    • Status: online
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/10 05:00:37 (permalink)
    0
    I’m hoping by the time I reach that age euthanasia will be legal. It would be nice to be able to say my goodbyes and check out on a high note. Suffice to say I couldn’t choose either.

    Really sorry to hear the stories in this thread though guys.
    #6
    Uriel
    Pro-Member
    • Total Posts : 5156
    • Reward points: 4555
    • Joined: 2013/01/20 20:48:48
    • Status: offline
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/10 07:43:18 (permalink)
    0
    Either way I hope I'd have the strength to just end it. I guess if my brain goes first it's worse since I may not realize what's happening.
     
    I've always made it clear to those close to me that I'd rather die than live like that. If you can call that living.
    #7
    G00SE
    Universe Member
    • Total Posts : 266
    • Reward points: 6646
    • Joined: 2009/03/06 17:59:40
    • Status: offline
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/11 08:09:26 (permalink)
    0
    I think about this as well, and I haven’t long had to care for my father who had pancreatic cancer. His body slowly started to shut down, and he lost control of most things. Was terrible to see but I think the survival instinct in his mind just kicked in and maked him want to live no matter what.

    I often read that stopping taking on fluids can make for a more peaceful death and it was obvious in my fathers case that he only ate and drank due to my families insinstance and some from the nurses. And it’s something that I often think I would do, especially if my body was telling me it didn’t want sustinence anymore.
    #8
    doc
    Pro-Member
    • Total Posts : 6250
    • Reward points: 13386
    • Joined: 2001/09/21 11:37:55
    • Location: United Kingdom
    • Status: offline
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/11 08:51:41 (permalink)
    0
    seen both scenarios, one family member has motor nuerone disease , has no bodily functions, just a functioning brain , that I definitely wouldn't want , also had my grandmother die with Alzheimer's and would want that either , suppose I would choose the body to go first because at least you can make conscious decisions like euthanasia, watch tv , play chess etc . I think in either scenario I would choose euthanasia once I'd fulfilled my responsibility for my kids.
    #9
    Dav
    Pro-Member
    • Total Posts : 8574
    • Reward points: 11164
    • Joined: 2004/06/04 20:42:38
    • Location: United Kingdom
    • Status: online
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/11 09:50:26 (permalink)
    0
    I'd prefer not to have to choose (although I know we are not always that fortunate). I'll push myself physically in the gym and in life until I drop so will hopefully go out with a bang on my terms.
    #10
    Brett
    Pro-Member
    • Total Posts : 6972
    • Reward points: 11564
    • Joined: 2004/04/03 10:20:37
    • Location: Australia
    • Status: online
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/11 10:48:48 (permalink)
    0
    I say I would just clock out but it would be a very hard thing to do.
     
    I mean how do you know how long you have left? You might just last long enough to see your kids graduate, that marriage just around the corner, or folks visiting next year. Might just end up being one of those 'I'll do it tomorrow' things if you did actually have the choice!
    #11
    BigWig
    Pro-Member
    • Total Posts : 1238
    • Reward points: 5944
    • Joined: 2011/04/15 11:12:19
    • Status: offline
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/11 11:19:30 (permalink)
    0
    My aunty had alzheimers and passed away at a young age she had very early onset dementia in her early fifties. She was my mothers sister and a mother of 3. She was beautiful funny and kind. My parents had a ****ty relationship which affected me badly. Id stay with her a lot as a kid and into my teens. Her deterioration was awful and i kind of closed off to it in the end, something i regret and am ashamed of. She wad a completely different person in the end. Hard to believe. So basically id rather just snuff it quickly and as painlessly as possible. My dads 70 now and hes a frail old man in comparison to when i was young. He worked physically all his life and was always fit and strong. I look at him now ( i look like my dad) and think FCK THAT!!!
    #12
    john_waston
    New Member
    • Total Posts : 25
    • Reward points: 74
    • Joined: 2018/07/13 14:13:21
    • Location: London
    • Status: offline
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/11 13:24:49 (permalink)
    0
    old age is an ungrateful but natural stage of our life. Personally, I would not want to lose control over who I am and what I do and what I can do. At some point, the awareness that we may not get to know our family is probably worse than the lack of physical fitness
    #13
    john_waston
    New Member
    • Total Posts : 25
    • Reward points: 74
    • Joined: 2018/07/13 14:13:21
    • Location: London
    • Status: offline
    Re: Mind or body? What would you want to go first as you age? 2018/08/11 13:24:52 (permalink)
    0
    old age is an ungrateful but natural stage of our life. Personally, I would not want to lose control over who I am and what I do and what I can do. At some point, the awareness that we may not get to know our family is probably worse than the lack of physical fitness
    #14
    Jump to:
    ©2018 All content is copyright of MuscleTalk.co.uk and its use elsewhere is prohibited.
    (posting guidelines | privacy | advertise | earnings disclaimer | contact us | supported by)
    © 2018 APG vNext Commercial Version 5.5