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Possesive Women!

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dj2000uk
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2005/08/01 12:02:31 (permalink)
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Possesive Women!

Has anyone here had any experiances with over possesive women, I have been with my g/f for nearly 2 years and split up several times due to the possesiveness but it just keeps happening.

any advice with people who have had simlar experiances?
#1

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    Spirit Guide
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 12:06:35 (permalink)
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    buy her a puppy - might deflect the attention away from you

    unfortunately, this puppy is going to grow into a big, mean, snarling dog which is only going to help her to control you
    #2
    mad_cereal_lover
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 12:10:33 (permalink)
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    I'd rather have a possesive woman than no woman at all

    mcl
    #3
    dirge
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 12:13:00 (permalink)
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    only advice is can give you mate is talk to her about it. ask her if she realises she's doing it and whether she thinks it's right or wrong. you can only sort things out if she realises there's a problem and tells you she's willing to take steps to resolve the matter. if she is point out when she's doing it, but make sure its not in a confruntational way.
    #4
    footdee
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 12:13:16 (permalink)
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    If it's been happening for 2 years it's probably not going to change any time soon. If you can't cope with it, think about ending the relationship before things get nasty on her part or you explode.
    #5
    Play
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 12:14:49 (permalink)
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    Yep i had a couple like that. they will also get an idea in there head and the sit and stew on it and twist it so much. Plus every little thing i do in there head results in me shagging another lass.

    Plays brushed his teeth again today = going to meet another lass
    #6
    GTM
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 12:31:19 (permalink)
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    Generally speaking people are possesive about partners because they are insecure and have a significant inferiority complex of some kind. There is likely to be something about herself that makes her feel that she isn't worthy of your love etc. Two options here. Either you learn to give her a lot of attention, (of the right kind - so you need to learn what her issue is), from now on or she goes and talks to a psychologist about why she feels this way. The first option is immensly emotionaly draining especially if you don't truely understand the issue (unlikely if you don't have similar feelings) and isn't really a long term option. She needs to talk to someone about it. It's possible that just better communication between the two of you would be enough, but given that you've been with her for two years now and it keeps reoccuring I would guess her issue is more deep rooted and she should talk to someone about it, alone at first and then possibly together with you if required.

    All, IMHO and IME of course.

    GTM

    Just because one can't understand a concept, doesn't mean that it is wrong.
    #7
    Joe
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 12:50:49 (permalink)
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    ORIGINAL: mad_cereal_lover

    I'd rather have a possesive woman than no woman at all

    mcl


    No, no you wouldnt.

    He who makes a Beast out of himself, gets rid of the pain of being a Man.

    Joe@the-darkside-uk.com
    #8
    Mr_Creosote
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 13:34:50 (permalink)
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    Dj , i dated a lovely girl (to start) .very attractive.Over the time she became very possessive.Really jealous when i went out to a point of calling my mobile all the time.So i stopped taking it and then shed get violent and cry over it.We talked and talked about her insecurity and the fact that i should be in secure as she was far the better lookin so why would i cheat.I got it back to the dad hitting her mum with fists.She grew up in an environment when men just hurt women.Sad. I paid for her to have counciling of which she did and we got engaged.But unfortunately the jealousy came back and although i never hurt her she was turning me into her father because i was becoming angry.Not at her (well it was because she started the arguments) more at me because i loved her but felt so helpless.It was ruining my job, health etc.She threatenend if i left her she would kill herself numerous times.I the end she said if i left she would tell her family id hurt her and get them to break my legs(and they would for a small fee,believe me) But in the end i had to go broken legs or not.I said goodbye to her in a nice way.Was one of the hardest things ive done as i did still love her tho i felt anger.I didnt get my legs broke and have spoken to her a few times and she told me losing the only person who knew her and stood by her so much was a good thing and she now has a healthy relationship with a nice guy.I still feel a bit messed up in relationships but im so glad shes happy .Thats all i can say really dj

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    #9
    windymill
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 13:55:08 (permalink)
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    I had one possesive g/f and found it a bit flattering really as I have a face similar to a bulldog licking pi$s of a nettle.
    #10
    kitty
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 14:00:29 (permalink)
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    Maybe she has reason to feel like that. Have you been unfaithful or show attention to other women?

    Upto meeting my hubbie, I'd had b/fs I could trust and some I couldn't. It's the ones you feel you can't trust that make you a little more 'possessive'.

    I've also had it done to me and it's not pleasant and ended the relationship. Basically I got engaged at 18 to a guy I'd been seeing for 2 years. He would go out with his mates on a Friday night and I'd generally stay in (all my mates away at Uni). However, when ever my mates were home and wanted to go out, he would suddenly not be going out himself and would sulk that I wouldn't go round and see him. It was good enough for him but not me...result was .........dumped him
    #11
    Mr_Creosote
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 14:03:33 (permalink)
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    Maybe she has reason to feel like that. Have you been unfaithful or show attention to other women?
    Like in my post tho kitty it doesnt have to be in the relationship itself to have caused that.Mine was from her other issues.

    Deads= 120kg.Squats=130kg
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    Current weight----13 stone 2 10-12% bf
    Goal---------13 stone 7 sub 10% bf
    #12
    kitty
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 14:08:46 (permalink)
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    ORIGINAL: robbo604

    Maybe she has reason to feel like that. Have you been unfaithful or show attention to other women?
    Like in my post tho kitty it doesnt have to be in the relationship itself to have caused that.Mine was from her other issues.


    Hadn't read your post robbo. Good point, that was sad indeed. Just thought my question was for the most obvious and easy reason and then is he says no, it can no doubt be looked at more closely.

    You could say that hubbie and I are possessive of one another now as we'd both beat the living daylights out of anyone who made a move on the other, BUT, we do not let that stop the other doing his/her own thing/ he goes on tour with the rugby lads and would let me go away with the girls if I wanted (not that I do but knowing that is nice). Having your freedom in a relationship certainly does help keep the balance.
    #13
    Mr_Creosote
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 14:12:20 (permalink)
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    Thats it kitty really.Its balance if youre happy with your partner doing all that you like to do then it will work.This will only work if this is felt on both sides.If you look at happy couples who never go out then you look at happy couples in open relationships/swingers the i guess thats the one comon law in each i guess.

    Deads= 120kg.Squats=130kg
    Start weight-----10st-5lb 15%bf

    Current weight----13 stone 2 10-12% bf
    Goal---------13 stone 7 sub 10% bf
    #14
    RudeboyR
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 15:02:30 (permalink)
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    I think my girlfriends possesive but im not too sure. Before she left a couple of days ago to go on holiday she started begging me not to go off with another girl and I was like I aint gonna go off with another girl just enjoy your holiday. At one point she was even saying please dont do it. A bit weird id say.
    #15
    Stone
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 16:03:31 (permalink)
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    id like a gf to be possesive, ive never had one thats was possesive as such. but id think itd be quite sexy having a lady to try and boss you around. i hope i meet a mature lass sometime, give me a good telling off when im naughty

    Hazard a touch of narcissism without shame.
    There is no room for junk food in any diet whatsoever, leave the junk in the bin.
    #16
    footdee
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 16:08:36 (permalink)
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    ORIGINAL: Stone

    id like a gf to be possesive, ive never had one thats was possesive as such. but id think itd be quite sexy having a lady to try and boss you around. i hope i meet a mature lass sometime, give me a good telling off when im naughty

    Yeah stalkers are sexy too huh?!
    #17
    easygoingguym
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 16:17:19 (permalink)
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    Hi,

    I had a girlfriend that was like that. Just tell her to f-off ASAP otherwise you'll go crazy and learn to identify girls and people live that to run away from them if you come across them in your life
    #18
    Adam K
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 16:22:08 (permalink)
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    i once had a gf

    then i woke up
    #19
    easygoingguym
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    RE: Possesive Women! 2005/08/01 16:38:13 (permalink)
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    It happens man nobody is perfect
    #20
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